Death by burger

Okay, this may be late, but only now have I learnt of the existence of a culinary monstrosity called the Quadruple Bypass Burger in the U.S. After seeing pictures of this 8,000-calorie horror in a newspaper here this morning, I was just too curious. I had to google it. What I found astounded and amused me in equal measure.

Available at the very appropriately named Heart Attack Grill in Chandler, Arizona, the father of all burgers has 19 layers that include two pounds (nearly a kilogram!) of beef in four thick patties. I use the masculine here because the restaurant management claims only a real man would dare to take on the challenge of wolfing down this artery-clogging sandwich. Also squashed into this voluminous burger are three layers of cheese, four bacon rashers, lettuce and tomato. One site claimed someone called Joey Chestnut had finished a Quadruple Bypass Burger in 1:42, not mentioning any unit of time. I hope that's in hours but have a nasty suspicion it's minutes. How can anyone possibly do that?!! You have got to have a death wish to even attempt such a feat.

That's not all. To make it an experience that would have any cardiologist worth his salt either keel over in shock or rub his hands in glee (depending on the ethics, of course), the Heart Attack Grill serves potato fries cooked in pure lard. And if you're so inclined you can round off the medically nightmarish meal by ordering a can of sugar-loaded Jolt power cola and a pack of Lucky Strike filter-less cigarettes! No wonder one of the perks of being a patron is having a skimpily-dressed waitress in a naughty nurse outfit roll you to your car on a wheelchair.

The restaurant owner claims in his blog (check out heartattackgrill.com) he thought it would be funny to have a hospital theme for a place that serves fare considered bad for health. And the more obese you are, the more likely you are to keep going back because if you tip the scales at over 350 pounds (that's more than 150 kilos!!!), you can eat there for free.

Now, I have never been to the United States. But all the people I know from other parts of the world who have travelled there on work or leisure have reported deep shock at the amount people in that country eat. The portions restaurants there serve have stupefied and intimidated each and every one of these travellers. I have only read and heard about steakhouses that offer not to charge patrons who can finish two-kilo slabs of meat, unassisted, in an hour. But what horrifies me is the fact that hundreds successfully complete these challenges! To my Indian mind (and appetite, which I must confess isn't small by standards in this part of the world), that's something that would definitely lead to death by steak. Or burger. Chew on that!

The Ostrich-isation of Oz

Oz is in denial. It is just not a good time for Australia. On the one hand it is battling a swine flu epidemic that is washing ashore mostly in the form of cruise ship passengers, and on the other is watching its reputation being torn to shreds over a spate of attacks on Indian students that the victims allege are racially motivated.

What shocks Indians like me the most is the Australian government's stubborn refusal to acknowledge that at least some of the attacks are obvious outcomes of racial hatred. Certainly brings to mind the image of an ostrich doing what it does best in a sandy patch. With all due respect to the authorities, but so many sudden attacks on brown-skinned folks can't possibly be "opportunistic" crimes. I find it hard to believe that struggling Indian students have suddenly become mugger-magnets.

The only official so far to concede a possible racial motive in some cases has been Victorian state police chief Simon Overland. But then he also added that a few of the attacks were "opportunistic".

Back in India, most of us had no idea that Indians were being targeted until late last month when we read about a student being stabbed with a screwdriver and left battling for his life. Soon after came the petrol bombing of another Indian student's home in Sydney. Only now are we learning from news reports that such assaults have been fairly common for several years, especially in and around Melbourne. But it appears the frequency and hate quotient have dramatically risen since the end of May.

News reports suggest that victims of attacks before May 2009 hestitated going to the police to press charges for fear of losing any chance of making a future for themselves in Australia. Some have even alleged that the police simply refused to record the crimes.

I appreciate Prime Minister Kevin Rudd's appeal for calm and request to refrain from doling out vigilante justice, but he must understand that the Indian student community - which is reported to be about 90,000 strong - is angry, vulnerable and probably a little scared.

These are young people. You push them, they will push back. So use of excessive force trying to break up their protests is probably not the way to win their confidence. Maybe you should sit down and talk to them. Hear them out. And please stop burying your head in the sand Australia. It is perhaps time to recognise that you might have a racial problem on your hands.

Watch and whine

As I type this, my kids are sitting behind me watching a Japanese animation series dubbed in Hindi. I can't tell you just how ridiculous it sounds, especially because the young voiceover artistes are for some incomprehensible reason encouraged to speak like whiny, inarticulate brats. What especially gets on my nerves are the inane "aaaa-aaah-waaah" sounds that seem to punctuate the dialogue ever so often. And the tone of speech! You have to watch one of these to understand what I am talking about.

Lots has been written and spoken about violence in cartoon films and their effect on a child's psyche and behaviour. All true. As the mother of two boys I can personally vouch for the fact that watching such programmes definitely triggers aggression in children. There was a phase when my kids watched such junk regularly and all play in those days involved some form of violence. Finally I banned the Power Rangers, Eon Kids and others of their ilk in the animation world from our home. The effect was almost immediate.

But I don't think parents have yet realised the danger from other seemingly harmless foreign shows. The anything but carefully thought out vernacular voiceovers to these programmes seem to be rapidly affecting children's temperaments and speech patterns.

In the past few months my kids have developed this horribly grating, whiny way of speaking. Initially I couldn't figure out where this was coming from. I merely had to question them about something they'd done and they would start moaning, screaming and complaining. Now I know why. It's the dubbed drivel on television. So now viewing of the offending shows has been severely curtailed. The boys' summer break from school ends this week and I couldn't be happier. At least their television viewing will dramatically shrink back to an hour or two a day. But they still haven't stopped speaking in that irritating manner. It might take months more to completely undo the damage.

Would someone tell the Indian arms of Cartoon Network, Nick and Pogo to please choose the shows they air more carefully. I'm not sure who does the voiceovers, but they certainly need to reassess their approach. Please understand that the tone used in these nonsensical shows could negatively influence speech in an entire urban generation. If things aren't checked soon, we could end up with a nation full of young whiners. God help us then!

Hello there

Well, better late than never I guess. I've finally entered the enticing world of weblogs. Through my tiny sliver of this gigantic pie I hope to communicate my thoughts, share my feelings from time to time. See you soon.